Feels so good…

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Feels so good.

We all have situations that make us happy and some that are sad, sometimes just not having pain or seeing family and friends can make our day, I think it’s difficult for those not suffering with multiple sclerosis to truly understand the struggles we go through every minute we are awake. That’s not a complaint or criticism, just a fact, it is what it is and we just get on with trying to make our existence a little more bearable. In my situation I never feel lonely or depressed because I’ve too much to do, I’ve made my life have a very specific goal and that’s to beat this disease, to remove it from my body and I have to say it’s a challenge, everyday it’s like I’ve been given a job to do. “Today Stefan, you have to solve this puzzle, the puzzle you’ve been working on for fourteen years”. I’m sure that this quest for 99.9% of people would be so freaking boring and frustrating, and it is for me to a certain extent, but in my case and I imagine for several others lucky enough to have learnt about Ann Boroch and her success in treating herself, then following a tried and tested set of rules it’s not a problem. Yes of course there are days when it seems futile because of self inflicted variations, but the good thing is that most of the time they can be seen as hiccups not permanent roadblocks. Regardless of what the world of western medicine thinks, regardless of their inability of comprehend the reasons why people with multiple sclerosis actually suffer and why they cannot make any genuine long term improvements, regardless of that, when we follow the plan, it works. It’s been four months, two weeks and one day and I’m 100% certain that I’m going to heal myself and that feels so good.

 

Guilty!!!..

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Guilty.

In the main I feel confident in saying that I’m following the ABP as close as I can taking into consideration that there are restrictions on the foods I eat and timing, I live alone and have a carer for an hour each day, primarily to prepare the liquids I need to drink and get my supplements etc. Obviously there are certain meals I’d like to have occasionally but it would require her to devote too much time cooking instead of doing the absolute essentials. That being said I’m quite happy with the current set up, and still get to eat nutritious foods, although it can become a little boring.

On Friday I thought I’d add a little more taste to my breakfast by adding Elmlea a non dairy cream alternative to my Quinoa cereal, sounds a little weird I know but hey… that’s me. So the Quinoa porridge with cream and Stevia was yummy and I thought would become a regular addition to my weekly regimen…….  Dipstick….. a few hours later it was as if all my strength had been sucked out of my body, I was very lucky Claire my carer was still there because without her help I’d would have been in deep doo doo’s…

Anyway in the afternoon I was able to look a bit closer at the Elmlea and its ingredients… bearing in mind that I honestly saw it as a non dairy alternative, I was quite shocked to see it was Buttermilk and had lactose. So there was the reason I struggled big time, so much so that I’m still a little weak now as I’m writing at 10pm Friday.

I honestly believe that following this protocol correctly will produce results that will amaze family, friends and all traditional doctors because it’s complete healing, that’s where I will be in time, that will happen providing I read the freaking labels, “sadly Stefan, that didn’t happen….. Guilty”.

If the shoe fits…

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|If the shoe fits….,.

Hmmm, where am I going with this… bear with me.

Imagine that your house, as nice as it is, is suffering as all older houses do, the roof leaks and most of the Windows are nigh on impossible to open along with the doors that tend to have lost their rustic charm only to have been replaced with a frustrating never close properly warped look. So you decide that there’s nothing else you can botch and self repair but to bite the bullet and get a builder in. Oh, that’s going to be expensive and awkward, having them disrupting you and your family’s life for however long it takes. So you make some enquiries and get several quotes, the builders all seem to be very similar both in their prices and in the description of work that needs doing, oh crap what are you going to do, you really can’t afford to have the disruption for that length of time and the financial hit will be a blow, so against all advice you call a local guy, some say he’s a cowboy builder that isn’t as well qualified as the others but you’ve been told he’s ok… ish..

Sod it!!! You’ll use him, I mean it might not be brilliant but it’ll just have to do. A year later you’re having second thoughts about your decision, he spent a lot of time on the roof but it still leaks a bit, the doors do close, with a shove and grunt. As far as the Windows are concerned, well, a bit of sanding here and there just hasn’t cut it.

So where am I going with this?

Doing the job half heartedly and taking short cuts just doesn’t work so after all the wasted time, effort and money, the only thing to do now is to get the proper builder in and do it right.

Now relate that to yourself and your illness, you won’t get better, you won’t get healthy if you don’t follow the plan, to the letter, the ABP that works, I don’t mean to be heartless and point fingers but if the shoe fits….

Could be right..

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Could be right.

I think going through the ABP is such an incredible thing, doing this obviously has very many benefits but there is a negative side as that it really highlights the damages that have been done over a lot of years. I’ve said with passion how good I’ve been feeling of late and that’s true, but the damage I mentioned earlier was shown very clearly Wednesday morning. First thing I felt great, so much so that before I’d drunk the normal amount of fluids, I decided to make some breakfast. Big mistake because while standing for several minutes I realised that I was feeling really, really weak, I struggled to stand and getting back to the sofa was really hard, my legs wouldn’t support me and I could barely hold onto the furniture, I was thinking all I’d been doing just wasn’t working. Anyway I made it back unhurt and drank lots of water and within 30 minutes I felt great again, so the momentary worry disappeared, the ABP is working and just emphasized the damage that’s been done and that in order for it to work permanently I have to be diligent and take nothing for granted. Apart from the 30 minute spell if abject fear, and it was  abject fear. apart from that I felt really good. I had the Levothyroxin first thing but I added two herbal supplements, not the new ones as they hadn’t arrived at that time but have done now. I did feel weak at 12.30 but not as weak as previous days, I rested for a few hours then went back to my normal day. The horrible feeling of overheating which has happened so many times, didn’t happen which made me feel very optimistic. This is being written Wednesday evening so tomorrow, Thursday I’ll have a half dose of Levothyroxin and two of the new herbal tabs, I paid a lot of attention to the ingredients and am happy about them. You never know, it could well be that it has been my Thyroid that’s causing the daily reversal, and if so then my progress will be even better, it’s such a good feeling to think I could be right.

Wrap my head around this…

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Wrap my head around this.

Over the past 14 years I’ve made numerous attempts at healing myself, obviously none have actually worked although one or two have made a massive impact and enabled me to keep trying and have justifiable reason to believe it’s only a matter of time.

The two previous that have done this were XanGo, a nutritional beverage that in all honesty saved my life, I was able to drink this 3 -times a day for ten years but financially became impractical, the second was the Youngevity supplements which I still take. I honestly believe that these two have brought me here to the place I am now which is finally on “The Journey” to the place called Health.

As I’ve said before I started on the ABP… the Ann Boroch Protocol on September 1st  2017 and in the main I am so happy about the changes that are becoming constant, a couple of months ago I’d rave about the improvement I’d had on a particular day, but sadly it would last a day and no more.  Of late, as in the last two weeks or so they seem to have merged together and last significantly longer, so I’m happy, right… not exactly because although the improvements last days not hours they are still broken up by a weakness that is downright frightening so much so that it really confuses me, I just can’t seem to wrap my head around it.

Obviously it’s cold now and in the mornings I’m actually shivering, I could put warmer clothes on and maybe socks as my feet are freezing but I know as I personally get warmer I become ridiculously weak, it’s as if I have 50lb wrist straps and 100lb ankle straps on so I’d rather stay cold than struggle so much.

Deep concentration here.. The ABP is working of that there is no doubt, but something is missing, there’s obviously something else in my case, the only thing I can think that it could possibly be is my Thyroid, I do take Levothyroxin 100 mg daily, I succumbed to my doctors pressure to take it and as I won’t take MS meds this was an acceptable compromise.

So it could well be my Thyroid  as among other things it also controls the body’s ability to regulate the internal temperature, knowing this I’ve decided to find a natural supplement and I’ve ordered the strongest herbal thyroid support which arrives today, so I’ll update you in a few days, fingers crossed.

My truth…..

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My truth..

In February of 2004, I’d been living in the beautiful state of Colorado for 2 years, I was married to a woman I thought loved me as I loved her, I had a great and very well paid job, lived in a fantastic house that was way too big for the two of us and two cats.

I had a really frightening experience one morning while getting ready for work, Dona my wife insisted I went back to bed where I stayed for several hours before being taken to see my doctor. After a 15 minute consultation he sent me to hospital. It was a 3 day stay and had MRI, Cat scan, EEG, Ultrasound and Lumbar puncture, at the end of all these tests the neurologist, a down to earth, shoot from the hip, tell it like it is New Yorker looked at me and said “there’s no way of breaking this to you gently Mr Cairns but you have Multiple sclerosis”.  Initially I was shocked then very sad then quite defiantly said “okay, I’ll deal with it”….almost like I’d just been told my car had just failed it’s M.O.T. not that they have them over there but you know what I mean. It was almost like I was looking at him as if he was stupid, I wanted to say “Hey!!! Do you know who I am? I’m Stefan, I’m from England… MS, don’t be silly, I don’t get MS”. I think it took a couple of hours before it sunk in, my wife and close friends were all very shocked but equally sympathetic and understanding. Over the next few weeks I had to make adjustments to my lifestyle and work etc, I attended the support groups and read all I could get my hands on about dealing and coping with this hideous disease. The doctors, neurologist and health professionals all offered advice but all  said the same thing which was the the disease would basically take my life from me, that slowly but surely I would become 100% dependent on someone else…..

Okay, let’s put this into perspective, I had a big tough dad from Liverpool, I do have an amazing mum originally from Berlin, I’m one of seven kids, I grew up in a house smaller than Ken Barlow’s, I didn’t have anything easy as a kid, telling me I have an incurable disease is like showing a red rag to a bull. Me!! Get beaten by a freaking disease… Nah, no way, never going to happen….

Okay Ronnie get to the point…. There will never be a day that I believe what “they” said… I will never give up especially now I know 100% that the ABP is the way, now it’s not just my “never give up” attitude, now I know what’s going to happen, and that my friends is my truth..

Half the problem….

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Half the problem.

In my humble opinion I think there is a misunderstanding about Multiple sclerosis in general and the same applies to Candida, no I’m not rating myself alongside two great minds, Dr Hal Huggins and Ann Boroch or saying I know more, because I don’t, and my all my knowledge, everything I’ve ever learned about MS could be held in one of their little fingers,  what they have done is genuinely incredible and I’m nothing in comparison. The misunderstanding or should I say unwillingness to recognise the positive link between those two diseases, no hold on, they did understand that one, Candida, exacerbated the other, MS, but not necessarily that certain symptoms of Candida could well be a precursor to multiple sclerosis. This is purely my opinion, not based on specific scientific or medical research but something that appears logical to me. There are lots of diseases that initially start as a simple and very basic, very treatable health condition, people aren’t perfectly healthy one day then wake up the next with pneumonia, it starts with what appears to be simple cold like symptoms..

What I’m saying is, again in my opinion, that the base of multiple sclerosis is candida, if you go for screening or a blood test, you would never be told ” if you aren’t careful you might get MS”… why because there aren’t markers that are specifically associated with MS per se. However you might be told you have early stages of Candida and are given guidance and prescription drugs to treat it. Again, my opinion, is that multiple sclerosis starts with candida, I’m not saying if you have one of the very many symptoms of candida that it will become multiple sclerosis but it’s unlikely you’ll get multiple sclerosis unless you already have candida.

Dr Huggins kept his symptoms at bay using supplements, maybe if he’d talked with Ann Boroch about MS and candida he would have healed himself and not just eased the symptoms.

Ann Boroch healed herself by ridding herself of Candida which was exacerbating a so called incurable disease, incurable in the minds of others because healing it was never in their capabilities because they have only been addressing half the problem.

Please don’t be offended by my comments, my posts are almost like I’m talking to myself, these are the words going through my head and I just write them down, as if I’m  journaling.

 

Mind of it’s own…

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Mind of its own.

If you talk to a doctor or neurologist about this disease, the one that is a very unwelcome squatter in my body, multiple sclerosis of course, then they’ll explain about the various stages it goes through from relapsing-remitting through to progressive-relapsing with two other possible intermediate stages. Now their opinion is that even though millions of hours have been devoted to research they still haven’t been able to discover the real reason it starts or exactly why it progresses from a disease they can ease to a very minimal extent using drugs to a stage where nothing that they can con you into taking will ease the symptoms, I know for the majority of people that would be a very depressing statement to hear….

I say majority but what I really mean is 99.9%, almost everyone except those lucky enough to have a mind like a parachute, you know the “open” kind and will not listen to the defeatist attitude of those that simply don’t know….. hmmm, oh yes, doctors. I don’t mean to insult those people but we are talking about a life threatening problem here….. traditionally trained doctors say you’ve no chance whereas Ann Boroch followers say that there is concrete evidence proving that you can beat this over time.

Sorry I’m wandering again…… we know from reading her books that MS and Candida are very closely connected, Candida creating a state of candidiasis in the body and multiple sclerosis seem to be a more likely progression than developing the disease for no apparent reason. So the improvements, the changes I’m experiencing after 4 months and 1 week in my opinion are great. I’m still struggling obviously but it’s not as difficult or as painful as it was and considering that the the neurologist I saw several years ago told me I had no chance and from now on things would only get worse….. hah!!!!

I said the other day that the 40 ton truck moved an inch, after 4 months it’s moved several yards and it knows I’m getting more helpers to push this behemoth and its not happy about it, it’s applying the brakes because it has a mind of its own, it’s happy living here and really doesn’t want to move…. tough!! “You’re out of here”.

Multiple sclerosis and the ABP….

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Multiple sclerosis and the ABP.

I’m sure most other sufferers are in the same position as me in that we’ve had this disease for a very long time and have attempted to beat it many many times before only to be let down by what family members perceive to be just another snake oil. We’ve talked to our nearest and dearest and told them that this is different to everything you’ve personally believed and tried before, only to get the  eyebrows raised and the head tilted look and “of course it is honey” response. Inside you know this works and can feel the subtle differences yourself but those minute changes aren’t obvious to anyone not living in your skin.

Why can’t they understand, it’s obvious to you but they just can’t see it,  they’ve all done their research, they’ve read the reports initiated by the pharmaceutical industry that categorically state that this disease is incurable, and big pharma are billion dollar giants that have painstakingly spent millions and millions trying to find an answer with no joy so how on earth can little old you just do something as innocuous as change your diet and take some pills, not even drugs, but natural “supplements” but you believe healing yourself is possible….

Well it’s hard for them to comprehend that the billion dollar giants have never spent a penny on finding a cure, never!!! all they do is create a drug that eases a symptom and to a certain extent to mask the real problem. Disease in general is a cash cow for big Pharma, it’s relatively inexpensive to make a drug, provide the necessary incentives to the powers that be that enable it to be marketed, then set aside a few million for possible legal threats etc then rake in the billions in profits.

Back to your argument and justification for why you must do this and have genuine support. As I’ve said before, the differences to you are massive but not obvious to others, tell them that they are one of ten pushing a 40 ton truck, you are all pushing with all your might, it’s only moving an inch until two others join in… wow.. now it’s moving  two or three inches. Observers from a hundred yards away can’t see any difference but to the twelve pushing it, the difference was huge… you know that over the coming months another ten or twenty or thirty will join the push and then it won’t be inches it’ll be yards, it will be miles, all you have to do is stay strong mentally and persevere, ignore the naysayers, what Ann Boroch did was life changing, she did it against all odds and we will too.

Bad but good…..

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Bad but good.

Is that an oxymoron….. whatever, it’s probably the best way I can describe my Wednesday, this protocol I and many others are on definitely starts in a confusing way because your mind, you know the constantly talking voice in your head is trying to come to terms with the radical changes that happen. During that first month there are as many horrible days as there are good days and the differences between the two are small and not that good, so the chatty voice in your head is regularly telling you it’s not worth it, but trust me, it is.. The good days tend to bunch together after a few weeks interspersed by a bad day, a bad day that isn’t quite as bad as the previous one. Over my first four months of following the ABP I can honestly say that after 14 years of suffering with this hideous disease, I know without a shadow of doubt that being strong of mind during the bad days has paid major dividends as the time goes by. Yes I’ve made mistakes, we all do but because getting healthy is my number one priority I’ve got up, dusted myself off, learnt from my mistakes and pushed on. I’ve written most days because it motivates and inspires me, I’ve told myself and other people I’m getting better so I’m not going to let myself down. There have been some terrible days especially in the first 10 weeks but they have become fewer and further between.

Okay, the title….. over the past week or so I’ve had lots of really good days  days bordering on great so I’m a very happy bunny, (for the non English it just means I’m very pleased).. Wednesday up to late afternoon was great but for no apparent reason to me I became weak and struggled a bit. I’m writing this at midnight on Wednesday and I can genuinely say the weakness lasted only a few hours and it was nothing like previous weak spells, so yes it was bad but overall it was good, another great day.