Attitude…

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Attitude….

I think that the foods I eat  and the quality of supplements I take daily are instrumental in the progress I’m making, I want to clarify that statement and make sure I’m not giving the wrong impression here. Prior to starting the ABP I had a good diet, I don’t eat crappy, sugar laden nutritionally bereft foods, but I did eat foods that are forbidden on this protocol. Ever since I was diagnosed in 04 I’ve used good quality supplements, so nutritionally I think I’ve done well. Providing my body with good foods and supplements to ensure I was nutritionally supported was good but that was for any person, a human body, not specifically for someone with multiple sclerosis. So on September 1st I changed a couple my daily foods and over the following weeks I’ve added specific supplements that address the Candida which I was completely unaware of. The first two months were hard, I’d have as many bad days as good but the third month, November has been different, it’s an awful lot better, good days are far more common now and considerably better and the bad days aren’t really bad as such, they just aren’t as good as the run of consecutive good days. So to clarify, I still have MS, I still shuffle about clinging desperately to furniture and walls, I still have to take a three hour rest in bed from about 12.15 each day and I’m still having to go to bed, not sleep but be in bed by out 7 pm. But, and from a man that’s had MS for 13 years and struggled big time before reading “Healing Multiple sclerosis” and adopting this new regimen, things are so much better now and I believe 100% that I’m doing the right thing. The diet and supplements aren’t difficult to take everyday so sticking to this protocol isn’t a problem especially knowing that each day is taking me one step closer to my destination. Putting the right foods, nutrition and supplements inside the physical body I live in and just as or even more importantly, not putting the foods that harm me isn’t difficult to do especially knowing I feel physically better everyday. I honestly believe that meditating and telling myself I’m getting better, changing my attitude to not only being positive and genuinely believing, but really feeling it, is making a huge difference.

I should have known….

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I should have known.

Over the last three months I’ve had several issues with foods, luckily none of what essentially are forbidden foods have caused a serious long term problem and for that I’m grateful. During the first six weeks I was having a granola protein bar daily which definitely contributed to a regular as clockwork weakness ten minutes either side of 12.15, fortunately for me I live in a little flat so transitioning between the living room, bathroom and bedroom shouldn’t be a big problem. Sadly on one particular day it was, but the way I look at a 40 minute crawl, drag on the floor which was painful yes, but I learnt from it and hopefully won’t be a numpty again. I’m becoming more  aware of changes that I know are likely to become difficult for me within a short period of time so I see it as a sign and I respond accordingly. There are times that I get a little upset with myself when I eat something that causes problems and I think “I Should Have Known Better” but in all fairness I’m only three months old in this so I obviously don’t know everything. I’m taking this whole thing very seriously, I’ve had too many years which were a painful humiliating struggle to not do everything I can to rid myself of this disease. I’m being rewarded for taking this seriously and showing respect for the the late Ann Boroch and for Janet Orchard for guiding us all. Rewarded in all the positives that are showing me that when done properly, this works. I think we all have concerns and doubts at 3 a.m. feeling pain and frustration, but the positives I’m experiencing have told me a message that has been caste in stone, healing is mine if I want it enough, and I do so it will be so..

Could it be…

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Could it be.

I’ve said I’m very pleased by the way I seem to be slowly but very steadily improving, although my daily diet isn’t exactly exciting, it’s not bothering me, it’s reasonably tasty so as far as I’m concerned it’s perfectly fine. The steady improvements, the consistency which is very noticeable in my daily writing always pleases me, it’s a little thing I know but being able to hold the pen correctly and neatly printing sort of gives me a psychological boost in the morning.The guide of potential improvements that Janet mentioned obviously cannot be given a firm time as to when exactly they’ll happen but it’s very close. The improvements over the last three weeks also tie in with a change, an addition to my daily supplements. I’ve said before about the quality of them which I honestly think is of paramount importance. There’s a monumental difference between supplement providers, doing your due diligence when choosing the best quality will make a huge difference in how your body breaks down and truly assimilates the nutrient. About three weeks ago I included Hemp oil…. Cannabis Sativa 1000 mg 3 times daily. Now the last thing I’d say is that since taking it I’ve improved. As far as I’m concerned, the advice I’ve been give through reading the book and just as importantly by Janet has been instrumental in getting me to this point, a place where I know without a shadow of doubt that the ABP works. But could it be that that the Cannabis Sativa has helped to push things a little quicker, now I’m not endorsing the Cannabis or advocating you use it but purely from a matter of interest I get the Hemp oil, Cannabis Sativa 1000 mg capsules from Amazon, whatever, I’m going to keep going with this and keep an open mind.

Not all fantastic news…

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Not all fantastic news.

I think on Wednesday last week I’d started the day feeling good but by about 5.00 pm  I became very weak, and although last Saturday was great in the main there was a point late afternoon that I just felt very hot and a strange weakness seemed to overwhelm my body until I whipped off my T shirt and cooled down. These things happen and I really cannot understand why, it’s not as if it’s baking hot, but my upper body, my chest becomes ridiculously hot which results in a terrible weakness. So although I’ve definitely been feeling good of late, it’s not all fantastic news. Hold on, hold on !!!!! did I just say it wasn’t all fantastic news… uh, Hello!!! Let’s put this into perspective, over the last ten days while I’ve been awake obviously, I’ve been great for 95% of the time, so only 5% has been bad, and even that wasn’t exactly bad!! It just was a little frustrating, a little awkward. So in reality No it hasn’t all been fantastic but 95% of it was so I’m very happy and really anticipating a lot of great and even greater days to come. Missing out on the delicious sugar free chocolate and the other treats I used to indulge in is a pain yes, but not having them is a very small price to pay in exchange for feeling so good. Think about it, there are drugs that can make you feel good temporarily but have terrible side effects and will never, ever cure you, or, or, change your diet, eat healthy foods and cure yourself…. hmmm, let me think about that for a nanosecond, okay curing it is!!!!

They’re leaving…

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They’re leaving.

As I’ve said on numerous occasions, the incredible inner peace, the gratitude, the joy and the “I want to give the bird to the doubters” feeling makes me have that smug look you see on the faces of people that know something you don’t is plastered on my face constantly. As each day dawns for about a week now I’ve had these feelings because I don’t just think it’s working, I know it’s working. The journey as we know is likely to be a very long one, a two or three year dedicated one and I know there are likely to be days that are trying to sow seeds of doubt. But that isn’t going to happen with me. I’ve maintained a positive attitude for as long as most kids are in school, I’ve had some horrendous days, days that I’ve been puking and had diarrhoea at the same time. Days I’ve fallen and couldn’t get up for seven hours and been forced to sit on the floor, naked at 3 in the morning and that was in November a couple of years ago.

I’m not healed and not in my wildest dreams could I have expected that to happen within three months of starting this program, but the subtle changes that are happening, some staying with me for days, fading then returning are making me feel so good. I know it’s changing my life, it’s making it not just bearable but enjoyable. For almost two decades I be had really offensive, obnoxious squatters living in my house, but guess what…… they’re leaving.

My promise..

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My promise.

In mid August Janet and I chatted on Facebook and after numerous chats it was agreed I’d start officially on a very special journey. I truly wanted to believe that it was not going to be a lifelong journey but one with a very specific destination. That destination was going to be an elusive place called Health, this elusive place is a very popular destination but sadly not visited by everyone that takes the first step towards it, not literally of course but mentally committing to it. It’s so sad because for one reason or another that commitment, that promise becomes an excuse, a reason why it’s just not a feasible journey to make. After seriously attempting at least fifty, probably closer to a hundred other possible solutions to a disease that the world’s medical profession say is incurable, I honestly believe that this method, perfected by an incredible woman is truly going to work. I’m not unique, I’m not special, I’m not lucky, I’m just determined. I’ve been more physically active than most people, I was a bit of an adrenalin junkie, that doesn’t make me better than anyone else, but it does make me selfish. I’ve been there, done that, have the T shirt and video, and I want it back. I’m big time p¥¥¥¥¥d off, I’ve had nearly twenty years of being sick…. I’m done.. I’m fed up with it. For this reason I’ve committed myself to this journey, I knew it was going to be long, like walking from Lands End to John O Groats, I feel I’m doing well, I’m getting better, I’ve no doubt about that. I think I’ve made it to Somerset in three months, still a very long way to go but I made a promise to myself, and anyone that knows me knows I don’t break my promises.

The finish line…

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The finish line.

As anyone with multiple sclerosis, or any seriously debilitating disease knows, the options and choices during each day are very limited,  shall I read now or later? should I watch a movie on Netflix? What am I going to have for lunch? It’s not exactly challenging. No it’s not but when the most important thing in your life is what do I need to do to save my life, then the other things become a pleasant distraction from the multitude of things whizzing around your brain. Obviously I’d like to be able to live a decent life for what I believe will be at least another 25 years, so as a healthy man which I’ll be I have to find a way of earning money, disability benefits are enough.. ish while I’m sick and disabled but it won’t be there when I’m better. With this in mind I think I may have found the way and I’m excited about it, I’m not going to share the specifics yet but hopefully in a month I’ll have good news, but that’s for later.

First thing this morning and right through to now which is early Friday afternoon I’m feeling really good, I did notice my afternoon weakness but it definitely wasn’t anywhere near as bad as previous days. Midway through my third month and the bad days are not as bad and the seem to be a week or more apart, so all I was told at the start of this journey is actually happening. No one is going to tell you a specific day when you’ll feel stronger or be able to walk or any of the thousands of milestones that will litter our journey. We are all different in millions of ways, our age, our age when we got it, where we live, our support system or lack of, I think all of those things are going to be influential but none more so than one thing and that is following the plan and sticking to it. We all make mistakes and I know I’m guilty of it as much or more so than anyone else, but recognising them and accepting that as a weakened body our minds have to take up the slack and mentally push and push toward that finish line.

It’s not easy, but..

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It’s not easy, but…

As I said in my previous post, I knew I’d be good on Tuesday actually both Tuesday and Wednesday were great which sort of does and doesn’t surprise me, the longer I get into this program the closer I get to accepting that good things happen. I think anyone that has multiple sclerosis will have got their hopes up on numerous occasions only to have them crash down with a vengeance. In my case since my initial diagnosis in February of 04 I must have researched a thousand things, not necessarily a thousand but hundreds that have made claims, some ridiculously outrageous claims of cures that can be achieved within a week or a month and all you have to do is buy their products. So it was only natural to have been slightly concerned and a little cautious about getting too excited about following this protocol. However there is a massive difference between what I’m doing now and anything I’ve looked at or tried before. Firstly I was invited to become part of a group all doing the same thing as in trying to heal themselves of multiple sclerosis. The membership requirements were simply that I truly had MS and that I wanted to heal myself, no entrance fee, no monthly subscription, nothing, nada, zilch. I am truly blessed to have been asked and I know that like others before me that being healed and being able to live again as opposed to existing will happen. I tell myself everyday and this should be acknowledged and accepted by everyone with this hideous disease, no matter how many times you fall, throw up, have diarrhoea, get confused or have someone, friend, family or medical professional tell you it can’t work, ignore them and never, ever give up. Your body, the thing you live in is depending on you to do it right, it’s not easy but it works.

Will power..

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Will Power.

For me and everyone else on this very tough, demanding, frustrating, confusing,  journey, the one thing that will help us push through all the above emotions is a 100% commitment and belief that success and a return to good health is within our grasp. I’ve had what most people will think of as an adrenaline junkie existence, I’ve ridden at more than 145 mph on my Yamaha FZ1000 Genesis, not a particularly clever thing to do but it was me 20 years ago. Mind you as a speed thrill that didn’t rate much compared to a 180 mph head down no-lift  dive when skydiving, I’ve done 834 of them, skydives not no-lift dives. I was also a hang glider, SCUBA diver, mountain biker, rock climber and a pilot.  I’ve also been very lucky to have been to 21 countries and to have lived for eleven years in Colorado in the USA.

Having done so many wonderful things is all well and good,but it’s in the past and has no bearing or influence on this disease, it doesn’t discriminate between people from different countries, their gender, faith or lack of or if someone is good or bad, it just takes you, whoever or whatever you are.

Now when it comes to healing this so called incurable disease, the same  applies, as in if you follow and stick to the protocol then it matters not one iota who you are, your gender, your work, blue or white collar, if you do it as per plan and it will work.

Now there are going to be hiccups along the way, I personally have them on a regular basis, Monday was a pig for me but falls, frightening weakness and serious balance issues are particularly difficult to deal with as I live alone. But as I said, they are hiccups, it’ll be good on Tuesday (I’m writing this Monday evening). I’ve always believed that I’d heal myself, even ten years ago when at the time I’d been suffering with this for four years I kept telling myself I would find a way although I didn’t know specifically how, I just knew. Since reading the book and learning there was a documented record of the to beat this hideous disease,  my confidence is justified, now there’s proof. Now it’s not just down to my belief, now it’s the ABP added to my will power, it’s a done deal.

Should I be ?

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Should I be.

The ABP is a well proven protocol perfected by the late and great Ann Boroch curing herself of multiple sclerosis within just four years, since then, numerous others have gone on to do the same. Reading one of her books, specifically “Healing Multiple Sclerosis” filled me with a greater level of genuine hope and optimism for the future than any doctor, medical professional or method I’ve ever seen, used or read about since being diagnosed with this hideous disease in 2004. Unless you are unlucky enough to have it or are living with someone that does you can’t be expected to truly understand how this affects one’s life. It can transform you from a healthy active person as I was to just a mind living inside a body that you have very little control over and is in some degree of pain in a part of the non conforming body 24/7.

Anyway when I learnt about Ann Boroch, her achievements and more than two decades of health then her inexplicable death just over two months ago, I became very excited, nervous and quite frightened. Excited because she proved it isn’t incurable, nervous and frightened about my commitment and would I be able to follow the protocol correctly and if so would it work for me?

I see things very differently now, I’m still excited but the nerves and fear no longer exist in my life because now I have absolute confidence in the protocol and in my ability to do it. The only “Should I be” in my life now has nothing to do with being nervous or frightened, no, now it’s Should I be making plans for my future, the answer is “Hell yeah”.