Tale of two statements…

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Two statements.

Change the way you look at things. The things you look at change.

Ok I’m writing this on Sunday evening but will post on Monday morning.

The past five days have been the worst of my MS life, I’m not going to go in depth about the specifics but I will use the following to describe how I’ve felt, Frustrated, Humiliated, Exhausted, Confused, Isolated and quite frankly I’ve been Petrified. Now because I’m still tired and a little shaky I’m a little restricted, but I will go into the first statement, if I were to say how I feel right now based on the last five days and the previous adjectives then I’m sure you’d understand if I was a little depressed. But as the statement says, I’m looking at it from a different angle, things could have been so much worse if I didn’t have incredible determination and a wonderful niece, Debbie has been so good to me and it wouldn’t have been possible to get through if she hadn’t been there, so Thank’s Deb’s.

The second statement.

What you believe, determines what you make true.

Yes I have MS an incurable disease, apparently, yes I’ve been struggling and in a lot of pain, but what I believe is that I will come through this and laugh about what it was and not how it is.

Monday morning…

I can move my left leg, the swelling has eased and I feel stronger, I feel I’m back to my pre 5 day thriller  and so happy.

 

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Time..

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I often think about the world as we know it now, the attitude to life, the necessity to have things immediately, to have them bigger or smaller from a tech standpoint. In some ways it’s good that technology is moving so fast. It wasn’t that long ago, it seems, that I was thinking how cool it was to be able to send a text message from my mobile phone, wow it’s incredibly to look at the convenience of life in general.

All that is good and I have no problem with this but I hate the way that attitude has spread and infected other areas of our life in a very negative way  I’m referring to foods and medication.

Both of these industries have changed dramatically and their sole aim is to make more profit, regardless of the damage it’s doing to humanity.

The foods on sale have slowly but surely become less and less nutritional. Probably 90% of the foods in supermarkets contain far more additives that actual food. If you read the label on just about everything you buy you’ll see twenty or thirty ingredients in a can of beans or peas or tomatoes. Why is sugar added to most prepared foods, sugar is toxic, it’s a simple fact, that and lots of additives are Excitotoxins that stimulate the “must have more” reaction in your brain.

These people are all working in cahoots with the pharmaceutical industry, you eat crap that tastes good but has no nutrition then eat more of it and put on weight and get sick. Cue big pharma who with the help of the brainwashed doctor gives you a drug that simply ease one of the symptoms. Then you find you are on it for life making big pharma happy as you’ll have to increase the dose over the years and increase their billion pound annual profits.

Time is the title of this post, and this is referring to why so much is made by these shitbags, excuse my language. People want food, they don’t want to wait for it to be cooked for a long time so it’s loaded with synthetic and chemical additives so it can be stored longer and cooked quicker.

People in general have little patience so they see a doctor with a health issue (more than likely created by plastic food) he gives a drug that literally dumb’s the internal sensor into not recognising the problem. So the almost immediate reaction is good, but in reality the problem is still there so it’s  perceived as the drug came to the rescue, albeit short lived. All that’s happening is they are putting a sticking plaster on to something that needs a lot more, ideally to eliminate the crappy foods. But doing things naturally and correcting the health issue takes time.

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The happening…

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I honestly believe that the changes are happening, and no, I’m not Christopher Lambert, but I’ve made comments lately about the improvements I feel are happening to me, my supplements, meditation, exercise and positive attitude is making such a difference, It doesn’t matter what is thought by other people about my opinion because at the end of the day it’s me that lives in my skin. If I can feel improvements, however small and subtle they are, it’s an improvement at a time that the doctor’s, nurses and all in the medical profession expect a worsening of my condition.

I talked yesterday about my view, my opinion about manifesting and how it should be done. It’s my opinion, nothing more, yes I do see a lot of YouTube videos by various “Life coaches” that hold seminars all around the world sharing what they are promoting as the way to improve your life. Some I spend a minute or two before deciding it’s not for me. But there have been a few that have had very positive effects on me.

I understand that wealth is perceived in different ways by most people. At this time in my life I’m not in possession of masses of money, but I believe I’m wealthy, actually very wealthy because in comparison to a little while ago I’m so much better off.  I can pay my monthly bills, put a small amount into savings, buy food and the supplements I need so yes I’m in a far better place than a lot of others, I’m wealthy, not financially yet but I’m so lucky and very happy.

Anyway yesterday I said that I deserve to have good things happen for me and they are already, I’ll keep doing what I’m doing because it’s working. I’m no better than anyone else, but I am in my humble opinion deserving and worthy.

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Positive thoughts and feelings…

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I think we all have heard of “The Secret” and even if you don’t want to admit it I bet most people have tried one form of the recommendations in it at one time or another then probably just dismissed it as rubbish because there wasn’t an instant result.

I think it was Henry Ford that said ” whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right”. Well I’m a believer in this principle, I absolutely believe that I will be healthy and disease free, I believe I will be wealthy, financially, not because I’m greedy or selfish but because I deserve it, I don’t think of myself as hard done by or that my situation is worse than everyone else. But  I’ve always found great pleasure in helping others and as Abraham Lincoln once said “You can’t help the poor by being one of them”. So being perfectly healthy and fabulously wealthy will enable me to fulfil a dream of having a Wellness Centre and to truly help others.  

So according to some successful people that have used these methods, then manifesting, health, wealth, abundance or whatever requires not just wishing and saying things or having vision boards, it’s about believing and feeling.

Why am I sick and on disability? I’m obviously not doing it right or it isn’t happening because there’s a reason I need to be here at this moment. When the time is right it will happen, of that I’m confident.

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Cat on a hot tin roof….

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Now I’m fairly sure those of you older than 40 will have heard of that, what about “Man in a suitcase” or “Bird on a wire” or even “Snakes on a plane”. Ok most will know some or even all but there’s one no one will have heard of and that’s “Man in a fridge”. Sounds funny, yes and probably looked very funny but because it was me, then no it wasn’t funny at the time. How could this happen? well on Sunday evening I decided to treat myself to some yummy sugar free chocolate that I keep in the fridge. After I got a bar out and broke in half, I put the other half back in the fridge but my mistake it slipped off the shelf and fell onto the floor. I bent down to pick it up but my legs sort of buckled, so clinging desperately to the worktop with my arms and chin for what felt like forever until my shaking legs buckled beneath me I was straining with everything I had trying to not completely collapse. After two minutes of straining my legs gave out, at this point my legs were completely twisted under me, my head had hit the worktop as I slipped down and twisted so my back was to the open fridge. Ok this is when if it had been in a movie it would have been hilarious. But it wasn’t and I was in extreme pain with my legs twisted underneath me, I just couldn’t move. I had no strength to move or straighten my legs. After probably ten minutes I was able to force my legs from under me and move myself away from the precarious position of half in and half out of the fridge I was then able to close it then lay face down totally exhausted on the kitchen floor.

Things have been going great lately and I think if I hadn’t been making the efforts and improvements I have then I wouldn’t have been able to get away from this with only damaged pride. The lesson learned today is “Stop being a cocky git”, no real damage done.

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Minutiae

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Below is a description of MS taken directly from Wikipedia, the documentation went on for considerably more than I posted here.

The reason I did this, is to show how the medical world perceives this hideous disease. Apparently it’s the most common of the incurable diseases that affect the central nervous system. The statistics show that around 2.5 million people are affected around the world and about 70% are women.

Anyway reading through the full document (not included) it stated that about 1.5 % commit suicide because of it, and approximately 50% die because of symptoms within 25 years of contracting the disease.

Now in my case I personally don’t think any of the documented statistics apply to me, in fact I know the don’t.

I measure the changes, the subtle improvements I experience on a regular basis,  I have an innate ability to measure these as if I was timing a Formula 1 race, I have to look at the minutiae. I am special, I am incredibly strong mentally, I am Stefan and  I’m unique.

 

Taken from Wikipedia.

A person with MS can have almost any neurological symptom or sign, with autonomic, visual, motor, and sensory problems being the most common.[2] The specific symptoms are determined by the locations of the lesions within the nervous system, and may include loss of sensitivity or changes in sensation such as tingling, pins and needles or numbness, muscle weakness, blurred vision,[18] very pronounced reflexes, muscle spasms, or difficulty in moving; difficulties with coordination and balance (ataxia); problems with speech or swallowing, visual problems (nystagmus, optic neuritis or double vision), feeling tired, acute or chronic pain, and bladder and bowel difficulties, among others.[2] Difficulties thinking and emotional problems such as depression or unstable mood are also common.[2] Uhthoff’s phenomenon, a worsening of symptoms due to exposure to higher than usual temperatures, and Lhermitte’s sign, an electrical sensation that runs down the back when bending the neck, are particularly characteristic of MS.[2] The main measure of disability and severity is the expanded disability status scale (EDSS), with other measures such as the multiple sclerosis functional composite being increasingly used in research.[19][20][21]

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Am I obsessed?..

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Everyday I find myself getting a little upset by commercials on TV and the internet. They play and I think to myself that the advertisers are so good at telling blatant lies and right at that moment a million viewers are probably completely sold on the lie. Admittedly the advertisers are only doing what they are paid to do so they aren’t to blame. The makers are guilty aren’t they? I mean they are manufacturing a product that probably tastes good. But are they doing this knowing that the ingredients are bad and will cause health problems. If they know but don’t give a crap then surely they should be punished. Or is it that they simply don’t realise the damage they are causing? If this is the case shouldn’t the government have a law in place that says companies can’t simply tell lies about the nutritional benefits, that they have to categorically prove what they are stating. And unless they can’t prove it then the product should not be allowed to be sold. Sadly companies can show so called research that’s been done by themselves, not by an independent unbiased body.

How can this be done? How can products be sold that might well taste good but evidence clearly shows the danger.

This is done because of money being given as bribes by companies making billions jointly to those with authority to allow this to happen.

I don’t think it’s quite as bad here as it is in the U.S. but we aren’t far behind.

I know I often post about these things but it isn’t just me being obsessed but I am passionate about this, I worked in an industry that researched this and saw first hand what is happening.

To me it’s common sense that if a product as simple as tomatoes in a can has 10 or 15 or 20 additional ingredients including several unpronouncable things then it shouldn’t go into a humans body.

Hopefully others will do their own research and play a part in stopping this travesty.

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I’m first choice..

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In life we all have many choices to make, we decide what job or career to focus on depending on wanting to just pay the weekly bills and have enough left over for a weekend of fun or is having a longer term view on a career for life more important.

Where to live, the flat or house, the village, town or city. These are all big decisions that will affect your life and often these choices have an impact on others as well, wife/husband and kids.

But what if it’s choosing someone to be on you side in difficult times, who would you chose? who could you rely on without question, without a moment’s hesitation, who ?

I’m lucky because I know there are people in my life that when push came to shove that there are some, not all but definitely some family that would be at my side, I’ll not offend anyone by name but the ones that I know would be there know who you are…

But when I look at my everyday life, my challenges, my pain, my frustration, my heartache and let me say they are all great as in huge, then I know if I were given the choice of who to be, if I could be any other person, who would I chose to cope with this crap. Then my first choice wouldn’t be anyone else it would be me because I know not many could deal with this, not many would be able to fight and win this constant battle.

I’m not demeaning anyone else or saying I’m better than anyone but I am saying that very few people would have the patience, the determination, the stubbornness in reality to stick with this, to stay the distance when every medical professional I’ve met over the past  14 years have had a very different opinion to me.  The difference is they all have an opinion that’s based on failure, people in the main don’t beat MS or any other so called incurable disease, but they aren’t me or the amazing man in the video I saw yesterday..  

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Don’t try….

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I read a lot and spend a lot of time researching, I know a lot of people will think that if I read or hear about some amazing results from using or trying something that it has to be true and if I do or use the same thing then it has to happen for me. Well no, that’s not how I think, I don’t live in a dream world and believe everything and anything promoted on the internet. But I do believe in me, I believe in the power of my mind, I have faith in God, the universe or whoever is the ultimate power. Yesterday I was weak and after many years of suffering, and it is suffering, I slipped into a momentary lapse of confusion. But as I said that lasted minutes, no, seconds before an answer literally jumped into my mind. The happiness I felt at that moment was indescribable, I was relieved that there was a very tangible reason for the weakness.

I’ve said on numerous occasions that I know without question, without a shadow of doubt that I will once again be able to live my life not simply exist.

There is no, I will try.

There is no, I think.

There is only I WILL.

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Confusing day…

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I say this knowing some people will be saying to themselves that they knew my optimism was too good to be true. And to be honest I myself am tempted to think that way as well especially after my evening. But I’ll start at the beginning of my day, I was up and about at my normal time between 7.0 and 8.0 am. The morning was excellent in that I was able to do everything including a variety of exercises without any trouble or difficulty. As I’m writing this the reason I think could have caused my problems as the day wore on has sprung to mind. I’m actually feeling good knowing what caused the problem. Before I say what I believe was the cause I’ll say that from about 6.0 pm  I started to feel a bit wobbly in my legs. I decided to go to bed at 7.30 and had a serious problem getting from the bathroom to the bedroom which is all of 4 feet away. I almost had to crawl but managed with great difficulty. Even getting into bed absolutely drained me, at one point I even slid fell off the bed onto the floor but after about 30 minutes I felt a little better and I was able to get up and into bed. I imagine you are thinking “how can you slide off the bed”, it’s hard to describe how unbelievably weak I become, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t sit up in bed…So I tried to turn by forcing my left leg off the edge by nudging it with my right leg, then it fell off the bed as if it wasn’t connected to me. Then my whole body followed and luckily I didn’t smash my face into the bedside table (nightstand).

As |I said, I eventually felt stronger and again with great effort managed to gain some control over this thing I live in and decided to write Wednesday’s post. OK, the reason and I feel confident saying this was the soya sausages I had at lunch then again at 5.0.

It’s now 9.30 pm and the difference between now and 2 hours ago is like night and day. I was feeling so bad earlier I actually had doubts in everything I believe in, my faith in God, my belief in my knowledge and experience. I stopped and talked out loud, questioning Him and me. Then the answer came out of the blue, oh you stupid boy Stefan I’m telling myself.

I’m sorry for doubting..

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