Give up…

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Give up.

If I start my day as I did yesterday by being in my Mag Chloride bath at 05.45 and soaking for an hour then I feel so much better than I do on other days, so ideally it would be the thing to do everyday. However as beneficial as it seems, getting there is not as easy as you might think, as I’ve said previously, moving about is difficult, it’s physically very demanding, so the extra effort required, as basic as it seems, is really hard for me, on top of that the initial effect and for the following 30 minutes puts me into a state of utter exhaustion. So I go through a really conflicting period, I know the mag chloride has residual benefits but the “NOW” period is exhausting. Similarly I know the long term benefits of exercising are good for me but even doing what appears to be very basic fundamental exercise initially completely drains me. My body is shouting at me to not repeat the exercise…. please no more, but the mentally experienced part is saying “Stefan, don’t give up, don’t be a wimp”. My knowledge of how the body works, how muscles go through an accelerated period of atrophy because of the disease I have, I know if I don’t do it, if I don’t persevere with the supplements and exercise the MS will beat me. Anyone that knows me, knows I’m from Liverpool and I am a son of an amazing mother, knowing this you’ll also know that the words Give up, are not in my vocabulary.

The easy path…

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Easy path.

I think that because of the ease in getting a message out to the majority of people via television, magazines and the internet that misinformation whether we want to know it or not is crammed into our minds almost every minute that we are awake. So is it any wonder that 9 out of 10 people seem to be more than willing to take the easy path when it comes to what they see as an answer.

Living is a constant challenge, just being able to survive, looking after yourself, your spouse and kids is a 24/7 job… when there’s a problem with health for you or a loved one, the automatic reaction is to give/take a pill and because of the ease in the way the bastards, sorry, pharmaceutical companies pretend to be promoting something that’s good, you just believe them. The toxic drug, and make no mistake about it, it is toxic will temporarily mask the problem, drugs of today turn off receptors in your brain, the ones telling you that something you’ve probably put into your body is hurting you.

Hmmmm doesn’t seem like the best route to take, the keep mopping up the water method as opposed to turn the tap off and pull the plug out of the sink first way.

It scares me knowing that a billion dollar giant has completely brainwashed the people and the medical professionals who initially had the desire to help, but are now simply dishing out drugs and taking the easy path.

Who am I….

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Who am I…..

I’m not a Doctor or PhD…. I’m not a medical professional… ….

I’m not a magician…. I’m not an illusionist… .

I’m not special…. I’m not better than you…

Enough of what I’m not, what I am is me, I’m Stefan and because of that I know that certain things, good things will happen to me, for me and because of me. I know that I will get better, the disease that’s squatting in me will leave, how it will go, I don’t know but I do know….. not think… not wish, I know it will go. I will live a long healthy, wealthy and happy life. Again I’m saying I don’t know exactly how, I’m not being specific by saying I will win millions on the lottery or anything else but I know God, The Universe or whomever you chose to call him will make this happen for me, no one will be deprived or neglected because they are more deserving, no one will suffer but I will have health and wealth, why….. because I know I will…. because I’m Stefan….

150,000 and counting…

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Back in 1999 I’d been living in Florida for 18 months, that was broken up into several three month periods then a month or so back in England. It was a good period of my life, I owned more than 100,000 shares in a company that were about to have their IPO, and make me a multimillionaire. I’d spend my days researching other stocks to buy on the NASDAQ and working out at the gym or running on the beach, to say I was having a good time was an understatement. I looked forward to Sunday when I would spend the morning at my church, St Augustine Southern Baptist was a beautiful church in many, many ways. I remember quite clearly one evening leaving bible study, I was feeling quite humble in the presence of such nice people. I was walking to my car when a friend asked me why I was looking as I did, I explained that I was just a normal person, I’d done lots of things in my life, worked hard but what was about to happen would change my life completely. Again she looked puzzled and asked me to explain, I felt strange, almost embarrassed and told her about the shares, the IPO and the money I’d make, I told her that it just didn’t seem right and said “I’m not worthy”….

It was only a few months later that I had the fall and smashed my face into the concrete step. That led to the dentistry that in reality was the cause of the disease I have now. The following year saw the Geoff Squire intervention and the consolidation of shares so the IPO never happened.

Ok leap forward seventeen years to now, imagine this, you know how it feels waking up on a Sunday morning after over indulging Saturday night, you have a bit of a fuzzy head. What if you the had to negotiate your way through one of those fun houses at the fairground that has strange shaped rooms and uneven floors. Added to this someone has strapped really heavy weights to your wrists and ankles. You find it really difficult trying to do anything, your limbs are struggling with the weights plus you have really thick motorcycle gloves on making finger dexterity non-existent.

I say this because the above description would be hard to cope with for a few minutes, it wouldn’t be nice for a few hours, it would be horrible not being able to do simple, basic things because of the thick gloves, the weights on your wrists and ankles, the uneven floors, yeuk….. that would be really horrible if you had to be like that for a day. Welcome to my world but it’s isn’t a 24 hour annoyance, no it’s actually been over 150,000 hours. So I take back what I said leaving church in 1999, I AM WORTHY so give me back my life…P.S. Tinnitus and going to the loo 25 times a day make it worse but I’m not beaten yet..

Part six..

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Dr Grube picked me up from the airport and took me to her practice, it was after 7 pm but the staff had stayed behind so I could have all the necessary x-rays prior to the surgery the next day. After the full mouth series of x-rays Dr Grube took me to the motel and spent some time preparing me for what was about to happen the next day.
The next day was Wednesday and I had 7 hours of dental work done, my amalgam fillings were all replaced with a bio compatible material in the first three and a half hour sitting, the next three and a half was to remove my wisdom teeth and clean out a cavitation in number 19 on the bottom left of my jaw.
Because she used conscious sedation I didn’t experience any pain whatsoever, in fact that evening back at the motel I didn’t even need a pain killer. I went to a local restaurant and ate soup followed by yogurt.
I had no dentistry the next day, that was so important as it would enable my immune system to recover, then on the Friday I was quite nervous as I knew I was about to have my front six teeth removed, but Dr Grube was so gentle with me, the conscious sedation was applied intravenously before the anaesthesia, so no needles in my gums, well they were but I didn’t see them which I can assure you was far less traumatic.
When I awoke three and a half hours later, I felt a little strange, as in I noticed I didn’t have teeth in the front of my mouth however there was no pain at that time. I was taken upstairs to see the massage therapist who made me feel a lot better. Acupressure and massage reintroduce the muscles and nerves in your body that had lost sensation over the years since I’d contracted MS.
When I returned to the motel the discomfort and pain were starting to set in, Dr Grube’s husband, a chiropractor and herbalist had given me some herbs and botanical’s to help. That night was a bad night for me, I felt very alone, thousands of miles from home and no one to help or comfort me. I closed the curtains and took one percocet for the pain which in all honesty was really bad. I made ice packs by crushing ice and wrapping it in a wet towel which I placed over my jaw. As I was alone I had to replace this every 20 minutes which was a pain in the butt. I’d rest or at least try to, then twenty minutes later get up and refresh the ice pack. I didn’t sleep much at all that night but I kept telling myself that it was only temporary and that in a short while I’d be a lot better.
The following day was a little better for me, the manager of the hotel had put a fridge in my room and stocked it with lots of yogurt as he knew I wasn’t able to eat anything solid, he was a good man, in fact all the staff were very helpful at the Hampton Inn.

During my surgeries on both days I had 25g’s and 50g’s of intravenous Vitamin C, this made a massive difference to my potential healing. I have to point out that this was given over a 3.5 and 4.5 hr period, the Vitamin C is essential and has to be given over at least this time or the body will not absorb it.

You want to, I can tell you do, ok then but not too much..

My truth..

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My truth.

I’m reasonably confident that all I’ve written about in my posts is fact… I absolutely know that what I say is what I believe so it’s my truth…. I honestly believe that a large part of all serious illness is self-inflicted. Hold on, hold on, I don’t mean that everyone with a serious debilitating disease has thought “oh I think I’ll get sick today”. Obviously that doesn’t happen, no one wants to have a life threatening, terminal illness or a form of dementia, but what I do believe is there’s a sequence of events that slowly but surely lead you down the path of ill health. It can start with simple things like indulging and over indulging in foods or drinks or recreational drugs. Obviously the surface effects are things like weight gain or rapid loss, these can lead to anxiety or depression which lead to worry and doctors visits, then medication, I say medication but it’s not really, it’s just a pharmaceutical drug that eases a symptom temporarily.  All the time that this health issue, physical or mental is happening it’s rapidly affecting the basic functionality or the organs in the body. Every organ needs, what? pharmaceutical drugs? No, definitely not because all they do is mask the problem while the real cause is getting worse. What every organ, every gland, every cell needs is proper nutrition, the reason they fail or function incorrectly is simply because you’ve been putting crap that is nutritionally bereft into your body. Yes it fills you up, temporarily through its bulk but the feelings you misinterpret for being hungry are really but the incredibly intelligent body is screaming for actual, real, natural nutrients not chemical, synthetic garbage. So your mind is being fooled into thinking a certain way because the money grabbing pariahs are conning you while laughing all the way to the bank. So inadvertently you are making things worse, you have a responsibility to look after yourself and ignore the constant advertising feeding you blatant lies.

Sadly the changes happening to the body are gradual, it’s not as if the changes physically and mentally just happen overnight, they take place over months and years so aren’t necessarily obvious to you that doesn’t notice the small subtle differences in a daily basis.  Your organs are constantly fighting a losing battle, you don’t give it what it genuinely needs so it adapts, it makes adjustments but it can only do that for so long. Then the organ or organs say enough is enough and give in, they stop working so the doctor gives you something that allows you to keep functioning, The drug pusher, sorry, the doctor is happy to keep doing this because they themselves have been brainwashed by the pharmaceutical giants into keeping you sick. Take control, stop reading crap sponsored by the people that don’t want you to be healthy, it’s not in their financial interest to make people healthy. Knowing about this, knowing I have the ability to cure myself is my truth.

Go on, its no big deal to help by donating..

My Ah ha moment..

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As I’ve said before, my days are pretty much the same regardless of it being a workday or weekend, the routine of supplements and consuming my water and special drinks is 99% of the time exactly the same. That might seem incredibly boring to you but it’s a procedure that keeps me alive. No that’s not an exaggeration it’s a fact, by not having the water I become frighteningly dehydrated so much so that I’m unable to move at all. Similar things happen if I don’t take my salt capsules or the nutritional supplements. I’m sure some of you cringed when I mentioned the Salt caps…. contrary to the constant, blatant lies being told about salt, it is imperative that everyone takes salt everyday. Now to clarify that statement of fact, good salt, ideally Himalayan Crystal salt is jam packed with essential trace elements the human body needs, as opposed to nutritionally bereft table salt that does nothing good but lots of bad things to all the organs in your body.

Getting back to my point, on Sunday I did something different, not relevant to explain precisely but needless to say, something different. That evening I suffered terribly, the change in my physicality was like night and day, I was confused and quite sad until it clicked in my head, it was like a flipping light going on,  that Ah ha moment will help significantly. This complex disease that has unlawfully taken up residence is going to be difficult to beat but it will happen, of that I have no doubt.

My why…

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Okay so let’s set the scene, you’re going to have to take yourself back to when you were a 10 or 11 year old kid… it… Okay, now you know that for 99% of the time you are a good kid, you do all the right things, follow orders, requests by your parents and do better than average at school. This being the case under normal conditions you are pretty pleased with yourself, that’s is until you just seem to go through and uncontrollable rebellious streak. It only lasts for a couple of weeks but it’s happened and even though deep down you know it’s wrong you just changed. It’s at this time your parents decide to punish you, not in a physical way as that’s not acceptable these days, 20, 30 or 40 years ago it was perfectly acceptable but for reasons I don’t understand its not the done thing now. Back to my point, your parents have told you that the Christmas present you’ve been dreaming about is just not going to happen because you’ve been a rebellious, uncontrollable little monster so the prezzy you’d hoped for isn’t going to be waiting for you to open on Christmas morning. You being you accept that as a little monster you don’t deserve to get anything nice, you aren’t going to be rewarded for being a bad person. So one morning you wake and decide that your monster like phase has passed so back to being good, and hope that your rebellious spell will be forgiven, you’ll be in your parents good books again, you hope!! As the weeks and months go by you’ve reverted back to what for all but a two week period had been your normal ways. But your parents even though are treating you as their normal loving child have maintained that you need to learn a lesson that your behaviour during that two or three week spell was just not something that can be accepted so the special gift you were hoping for is still off the table. Now as much as you know you were a little monster you also know that it was a small break from your normal self and you’re back so surely you deserve your special gift. Your parents say no and you’ve lost the chance to be rewarded until you show that the bad you has truly gone. Now one day even though you are still sad inside but being a good kid you stumble across a big box in the basement and look inside, you are absolutely blown away because inside you see the gift you always wanted. Now you know your parents are trying to teach you a lesson by telling you that you lost your chance at being rewarded at Christmas, you know you weren’t supposed to find it but you know it’s there. They don’t know that you know so they keep up the charade, it’s frustrating for you because no matter what they tell you, no matter what they think you do or don’t know, it’s different now because you know, you’ve seen it, it’s happening.

Now liken this to me, to my current situation, I’ve got a horrible disease, I’m experiencing horrible things 24 hours a day, the doctors tell me that there’s nothing that can be done and if anything it’s just going to get worse. Okay I’m the little kid and regardless of what’s being told to me, I’ve seen the prezzie, I know I’m going to get it, the difference is I just don’t know when my Christmas day is going to be. I’m happy because knowing is my Why.

Part five…

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Think about it, big pharma spend billions on advertising their potions, you get sick so you take legal action but in the meantime you’ve helped line the coffers of two giants. While that is happening the insurance scam is growing, the food industry are not interested in health so they pile more and more contaminants into our food. And guess what, yes you get sicker meaning the insurance and big pharma are real happy.
To add to all this the ADA/AMA and ASA are spreading more and more misinformation so you get even sicker and use more drugs, it is such a travesty of justice how these groups are conspiring to make the world a sicker place, well most of the world anyway.
In October 08 I attended a three day training for new dentist’s in Colorado Springs, at the end of the first day I was leaving the hotel, in the elevator with Dr Blanche Grube and Dr Marilyn Medina, Dr Grube asked if I was going to have a total dental revision. I explained that this wasn’t possible financially for me although it was probably more important I have it than for most other people. When I explained I had MS, the shocked look on both their faces was a picture I’ll never forget.
Dr Blanche told me….yes told me that I was to come to Pennsylvania for treatment, then to my utter surprise told me that she would do this treatment for nothing, nada, zilch money. With tears in my eyes I hugged her and thanked her from the bottom of my heart, after nine years I was finally going to get better. I’d had the necessary impressions made with a local Huggins trained dentist which were then sent to Dr Grube, I’m sure you can imagine how excited and nervous I was when I arrived in Scranton knowing I was about to have an operation that could possibly change my life.

One or the other..

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Think about it? I really dislike doing this but when it comes down to it my life is the most important thing to me, so I can either accept that what I have of life is the best it can be and please understand that it’s pretty crap as it is. My day regardless of which one as they are all the same, my day begins when I wake which is usually around 5.30 am, I tend to check emails, play words with friends and meditate till I get up at 7.45 ish. At this time I’ve also drank a litre of water with baking soda. Breakfast is just a Snack a Jack rice cake then my supplements. I shuffle to the sofa and probably read. My days revolve around drinking about 4 1/2 litres of water with stuff in, having lunch and seeing my neice/carer for 45 minutes. Writing for my blog and watching a bit of early evening tv before going back to bed 12 hours after I left it, apart from 20 trips to the loo that’s my day Monday through Sunday. So as I said I can either accept that, or believe there’s something more. I don’t know what you would do but I do know what I would do…..Any freaking thing….. I’m never giving in even though what it is now is crap, although the weather to most of you is nice, it’s horrendous for me, just living my life is tough but the heat and humidity make it ten times worse, it really does. So asking for help, physically or financially is downright embarrassing, it’s humiliating so please understand this is so  hard for me. If……if everyone reading this cared enough to donate the price of a Starbucks each week for a month then I’d be so much closer to having Stem cell treatment and be able to Want to live. To be totally honest with you, if this was me reading about one of you, a friend or acquaintance asking for help, I’d be ashamed of myself if I didn’t do what I could to help.

One or the other… either haven’t seen my plea or you don’t give a crap… Go on, a fiver a week for a month, no big deal….